Entry 6... miss I am not so nice.

Hey Everyone, I’m Allyson. I’m your average teenage girl but with half the social life and twice the schoolwork. My writing is a little rusty but you’ll forgive me for that (I hope).

I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT…………….    I’m a sexy beast! ;)

         LOL

Okay. Even though I make Scarlett Johansson look unattractive, that’s not what I’ll be sharing today. Some other time though!

What I really want you to know is that deep down inside me, there’s a king-sized fashion designing talent waiting to be unleashed. I’m the undiscovered lovechild of Alexander McQueen and Donatella Versace, or at least that’s what I tell myself.

I’m serious. I love the art of fashion. Not styling, not dressing up, not combining outfits; the real art -The one of drawing and imagining the craziest and most unusual things, and then translating them into phenomenal attires. The art of taking inspirations from simple elements in our everyday lives and then going on to produce the most extraordinary pieces of clothing.

I hold designing in such high esteem as an intellectual discipline. Whether we admit it or not this discipline has helped to define our societies for many generations. From when Yves Saint Laurent first put trousers on women till today, designers have continued to be at the forefront of evolving human culture.

I’m quite good at sketching and creating designs. I have an eye for cuts and patterns. Generating colour palettes for clothing and redesigning old dresses to keep up with today’s trends comes easy to me. I’m not John Galliano (at least not yet) but I will not be humble about my skills. I may not be able to sing, dance, twerk or rap (seeing as those are the major professions these days), but give me an art-pad or fabric and sowing tools, and you won’t be sorry.

I first discovered this “gift” about three years ago. I had known earlier that I liked clothing and the art of dressmaking, but I associated that with my gender and thought nothing of it. Three years ago, I worked briefly as an assistant at a fashion house during the summer. I mainly got coffee and operated the copier, but watching the creative department draft and build up an entire collection of clothes was fascinating and inspiring and I soon started drawing my own designs. I already knew how to sew well and thus I began to make clothes on a small scale. 

Fast Forward to three years later, and here I am now. With schoolwork in the way (I am studying a course that has NOTHING to do with fashion) i have reduced my production of clothes to the barest minimum, but I still sketch a lot. I now sell my designs for money and I have dressed three brides J (well the third was my cousin so I’m not sure if that counts, you be the judge). I still hope to one day make clothes on a large scale and I have dreams of owning my own fashion house or becoming the creative director at Balenciaga in the nearest future. I’m not very sure of how these dreams will work out but God is on my side so I’m really not bothered. I’m careless in his care.

P.S. I want you to know that I’m good at designing clothes so that when you see J.Lo and Angelina Jolie in My designs you won’t hate too much. Till then….. :)

I DON’T WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT……………….

I’m nice.

Yes, I do not want you to know that I am a nice person. I do not need you to know that I’m pleasant, that I’m annoyingly kind and that in almost everything I do, I consider others before myself. I don’t want you to know just how much of a people pleaser I am; I will potentially go out of my way to see others happy, sometimes even inconveniencing myself. 

In a perfect world, being warm-hearted or having traits of niceness would be a delightful thing. Not in today’s world. Here, niceness is equated to stupidity. To be pleasant and kind towards everyone is seen as a weakness and a sense of fragility and softness is associated with those who go out of their way to please others. It is assumed that if you are very cordial and friendly, you are vulnerable.

Women don’t want to be with “nice” men. Those are the ones who get friend-zoned. Nice women are deemed “soft” or “weak”. 

Kindness at work is misread as incompetence - If you are too courteous or polite, then you can’t make tough decisions. You cannot take risks; you cannot command respect and you will be taken for granted. Co-workers with dreadful personalities are chosen for the top spots over you because you are deemed too lenient. This misconception is not just in the workplace, its everywhere in the society. In fact, it is how the world works. Nice people finish last.

I do not ever want to be taken for granted because I have manners or I choose to be polite. The last thing I need as I strive daily to combat life’s challenges is to be perceived as weak or helpless because I decide to display acts of kindness. I will not miss out on great prospects because the human mind is warped to see amiability as a short-coming therefore you won’t see me around brandishing my niceness. I will not go out of my way to help random people, and I save my sympathy for those close to me. I’m not being horrid, I’m being feasible.

“The diseases which destroy a man are no less natural than the instincts which preserve him.” In a world where kindness is seen as a disease, I must learn to preserve myself and subsist, even if it means suppressing a trait that should normally be lauded.

I don’t want you to know I’m nice, in fact, I am not nice.

From Miss I AM NOT NICE, have a splendid week.